Saturday, October 24

Break Room Brawl .

there are people in this world that count calories and a co-worker of mine is one of them . today she was in the break room with all her toppings to make a salad talking about how many calories she would be digesting if she was eating In & Out burger .


-I'm eating In & Out Burger.-


how instead of eating processed cow parts she has grilled chicken.


im eating processed cow parts. - stops chewing, looks at burger -


instead of "secret sauce" she has low fat ranch .


- wipes "secret sauce" from lips -.


does anybody else want to kick her in the throat ?! as i watch her thoroughly enjoying her salad and ruining my lunch, i get up from the table while taking a sip of pink lemonade. i savor the sweet tangy taste on my tongue and dump the rest on my co - workers head. i grab a handful of her "healthy" salad and smash it in her face and begin to explain to her that it does not matter what you eat as long as you burn the calories off. that if she was going to put loads of ranch, practically a whole chicken, more than "bits" of bacon, and realistically a bun worth of croutons she should have just had In & Out like other "great looking" Americans that eat In & Out for lunch.


Gwen you have a call on line one . - " huh ? "


" So by doing it this way, by the time i get off work i have burned these calories off and need to just have a light dinner . "


- takes another bite of burger and throws it in the trash-


I'm suppose to be on a diet . -_-


pennanddpaper .

Thursday, October 22

Perfection . ( a breakdown of oneself )

I'm not perfect . i don't claim to be . and if i had the choice i wouldn't want to be . in fact, if you know me or ever get the chance, you will see that you couldn't even list any of the letters in my name! in that category lol . i feel as though women are honest about what they want to be honest about and that's cool, but me i gotta keep it real "breh" and on this post, I'm letting down my hair . ( figuratively. my hair is short lol )


  • My Hair



used to be "bangin" or really long, and naturally curly . in fact many loved my hair and never failed to mention it or how they wished they possesed the same . cool, thanks. but i got sick and tired of being defined by it. guys " id love to pull on it ." really, was that suppose to make me want you ? girls " omg ! i love your hair . i wish my hair was like that. " why ? be happy with what you have . i think people put to much emphasis on what "good hair" is and it can really become ridiculously time consuming to everyday try looking like everybody else. your hair is naturally curly, why are you spending hours straightening it. your hair is straight, why are you buying loads of hair products and a diffuser to get it curly. now I'm not saying don't switch it up sometime, hey we all need a change, and im definately one ALL for change. I'm saying be happy with what you have and don't put so much emphasis on what you don't. if you have "nappy", long, short, curly, straight, frizzy, whatever kind of hair work it ! its yours and you are beautiful . : )


  • My Head


me being mixed with everything under the sun, 12 nationalities, and one being part Samoan i have a big head. yes, i can admit it. my head is round, wide, and with a point to my chin. ( Kat Deluna facial structure. ) i grew up with people calling me names like big head and water head. even my nephew still cracks jokes about my head to this day, but its all good. i love my big head. its filled with knowledge, great memories, amazing ideas, endless stories, and poetry that comes to life. i have a heart shaped face. the face of love .




  • My Eczema


as i have matured from a little girl to a young woman i have always battled eczema. i have had it on the back of my neck, the inner bend of my elbows, and around my mouth. the outbreaks i would get on the back of my neck and inner bend of my elbows came and went fairly unnoticed but the eczema around my mouth was just awful. when i was younger i didn't know how to care for it properly and me being very young and active, my mom couldn't keep up with me long enough to try to either lol. when i reached 6th grade and on up through middle school i got picked on and teased. i would cry about it and ask god to please just take it away. it was hard to deal with and it caused me alot of pain and discomfort both physically and emotionally. it also left me with alot of self esteem issues about my appearance. leaving dark discoloration on the top of my lip and the two corners. now at 18 it is has cleared up substantially but i still live in fear of it coming back so i make sure to apply cortizone cream 2 to 3 times a day.



  • My Body


I'm not one of those skinny, salad chomping chicks that fit in size 3 jeans and small shirts. not knocking salads because i love em ! or "petite" woman. please dont try making this about you because i am in no way attacking you guys . ♥ . i eat. i love to eat ! and i don't appreciate men that can call me fat or any other woman fat because we're not model size. i have curves. i have hips. i have breasts. and i have booty. 36-28-36 thank you. and anybody that is in the "thick" or "curvy" category should know its not exactly easy to keep the shape, especially if you want it to look good. a few too many good meals and no exercise or activity will have you floating between "thick" and a question mark .



i grew up not understanding that i was womanly before my time and hating my body because it developed quicker than the other girls my age. i hate hearing younger girls that are battling eating disorders and personal image issues because of what their friends look like or what society is pushing as "normal ." sweetheart its NOT normal to kill yourself to become a size that your not meant to be let alone will ever achieve because its not in your genetic makeup. learn to love and be happy with yourself. there is always gong to be somebody smaller and bigger than you.

  • My Toes


i like to think i have nice feet. not gorgeous or foot model kina feet but presentable pretty feet with cute toes. BUT i do have one *perfection. my big toes. there not exactly small and there not exactly in proportion to my other toes but i still wear sandals, my peep toe stilettos, and always running around barefoot because my imperfections are what i love so much about myself. i mean what is a bigger big toe compared to a beautiful personality? its not ginormous ! lol so don't think that but it is a *perfection.




              • My Teeth


              ever since i was younger my teeth have always been short and small. my family have been quoted saying " for the longest we never thought your teeth was going to grow. they just looked like somebody sawed them off " lol geez tell me how you really feel guys ! i don't have any chipped teeth or missing teeth but i do have a few small spaces between my teeth and they are still "little" but i still smile big, laugh loud, and carry on conversations like its nobodys business . : D



              • My Lips


              aren't tiny or small. they are full and proportioned with 3 or 4 beauty marks on them. i dont have lips for pecks. i have lips for kisses. deep, passionate, hold my face type of kisses. people have and probably do laugh and talk about them but I'm one of many who don't need collagen injections. so who laughs now ? : )

              so yea, here are some of my *perfections . we are all human, no one of us alike and it was about time somebody stepped up and told the truth . so evaluate yourself and pick out the things that just need a little more love than others. ♥




              pennanddpaperr .

              Wednesday, October 21

              Currently .

              i am...

              • sitting at the computer watching ATL.


              alot of females these days think T.I. is cute, but I just don't see it . for one he's short - no bueno, he does this nasty looking lip sucking thing - ugh, and hes really skinny - need i say more ? but he is a good rapper i must admit. alot of his songs have been " my jam ! " at one point and time. : ) but uhmmm ... dude in the car trying to cop the dro ?! lmao, and that little fast ass little girl in the backseat with Ant, smh, said "baby" 4 times in like 40 seconds. we got it the first time Ashanti.


              i recently...


              • just lost my monroe ring . : (


              by recently i mean like 30 minutes ago. smh. it all happened when i was eating a super yummy cinabon that i know i shouldn't have been enjoying as much as i was, because as i have said I'm on a diet. well when i bit down, i felt something hard. definately not the warm, gooey goodness of icing and cinamony pastry ! i felt around and sure enough it was the little bar of the ring in my mouth and i had lost the jewel somewhere in the couch. or the carpet now that i think about it. a super cute light blue stud. : ( idk if I'm more sad that i lost the ring or in a few short hours or days idk, the hole will be closing. hm. guess i shouldn't have been eating that cinabon...smh.


              i have...


              • incredible curls at the moment !


              i mean those wonderfully shiny, bouncy, lively, soft curls ! not the kind you get from a curling iron, a weave (not knocking weaves), or depending on your nationality - a perm . want to know how i got em ? : ) i thought you would. well it was quite simple, i took a shower, towel dried my hair and applied mousse ! lol that's the big secret . when i was gushing about them to my cousin he totally whipped me back to reality " what did you expect ? your mixed and have white people hair that is naturally curly. " geez "booka" can i live in my curly culdesac of happiness for a second. its all good though. i love white people and my moussed up enhanced head of curls . *Zsnap .


              pennanddpaperr.