Friday, January 29

I'm Just Saying .

I have reached the conclusion, and this is final, that I would rather have a big ass than a flat stomach. I mean let's be real when has a flat stomach ever come in handy in the bedroom? sure it looks good but can you hold on to it and smack it? <--- that doesnt sound sexy to have happen to your stomach.

*kicks up feet in La-Z-Boy and sips her slurpee*

I'm not saying catch a severe case of i-don't-give-a-fuck-about-cardio-and-crunches but I wouldn't be in the gym killing myself to look like these video 'model's? most of the shit is edited and airbrushed anyway.

-pause- where the hell do they find these chicks though?! I mean I have never walked down the street and saw a chick walking around with a body like any of them skeezers on tv. you? -play-

take me for instance. I like to think I have a nice little shape. Nice size chest, boarder line thick thighs, round ass-ets, and a four pack stomach. you knooow, flat but with a little pooch at the bottom... lol

imaginary voices of women in agreement "Hmm mm !"

That's good enough for me and apparently for all the guys *no cockiness intended* that hit on me and would "love to wife me." YUCK !

*leans forward on her elbow and puts on some attitude*

In this world only two things matter to the average man. How you look with it on and what you can do when it comes off. intelligence, independence and yada yada yada to those who arent just tryna bust a nut. small percentage. But hey, even complete air heads get banged so what does that say? Not to mention even the most unappealing people get it in.

While you can get rid of a lil excess baggage in your tummy area you can't grow ass. Don't try that getting it hit from the back bullshit either because its a temporary fix. NOT my personal experience but a friends and hers came and went. You either have it or you don't. You can firm it, plump it, work it out, and lose it but can you grow it?

*leans back, sips on slurpee, and gets a brain freeze. looks up while holding head and squinting*

but don't get me wrong, nobody never said you cant have both .


Wednesday, January 27

He's Stupid and You're Dumb .

It kills me when women get with a guy with intentions of changing him. I mean really, what the hell is that?! You fall for him knowing what the shit is before hand: he was with somebody, showed some interest in you, talked big shit and made his original chick seem like nothing more than a jump off, ends up spending more time with you but she keeps popping up because SHE can't get over him? Uhm WRONG ! I want to just shake the hell out of these females, rewind the production of this so called relationship, and pin point every time she should have kicked gravel and traveled.

They must have never been told, so I will do it : You can NOT change people ! If they don't want to change there is nothing you can do to make them. You can love them all you want, give them whatever they want, and run whatever 'game' you think you are running but the shit won't change. AND don't even begin to think because you read it in a urban novel the power of pussy is going to get you anywhere. When you lay down together the shit is bueno but when you get up he's the same little boy that just sweated out your weave, fucked up your sheets, and leaving pleased.
POW ! You - 0 , Him - 1

Don't say 'I'm through !' either. To turn right around and take him back when he comes with apologies, tired ass excuses, and a whole bunch of bullshit act right that never lasts. I know bitches can really be on some foul shit and you can't always trust them but if her story sounds far fetched and his story too innocent, somewhere in the middle lies the truth.

So go ahead and cry girl. Hate him and her for as long as it takes and blame yourself while at it because in the end you will have learned, you can't change people.


Did You ?

if you watch Teen Mom, like i do religiously, you would have seen the finale tonight when Tylor took Catelynn out to lunch and proposed to her... *awwww*
can i get one of these please?!
*big smile with hands clapsed, i promise ill be good !*
minus the baby and adoption delima .

i am SO ready for the Teen Mom reunion and the NEW season of 16 and Pregnant !!
*jumps up and down in her Ni Hao, Kai-lan feetie jammies*
DONT JUDGE ME . shes the ish !


Tuesday, January 26

poet's Jasmine

she posses the petals of pure innocence .
her feminine sweetness and beauty.
capturing your eye and breath , gently whispering .
her love and all she has to offer seemingly small but elusive .
unlike any other, for the taking if you be gentle and not abuse her .
kisses like a lover , healing like a mother , restoring the balance of energy .
a real woman, relying on what surrounds her .
focused on adding and multiplying , not subtracting and dividing .
gentle hand, so steady . confident and ready .
shes what the world needs to encompass yearly . severly .
a leader, a teacher, a reacher . little things in return for the way she relieves us .
optimism and euphoria - let it develop in you.
feel the reality of these words penetrate you.
as you try to figure out if its a person or a flower i present to you .


Monday, January 25

Not Out Of Guilt But Compassion .

You still don't understand why it was that I took off in the first place, why I had to, what it would have meant for me if i did not. You don't see ur part in all that happened, either, not at all, nor any of the reasoning or feeling that drove me to do what I did.

All you see is my fault.

That's easy, of course. It's so obvious.

Yet if I know anything, I know this, my former boyfriend: You've got to understand more than you do right now if you're ever going to get over to the other side, to the place where there is light and heat and a fresh sunrise every day. And I want that for you to.

But I can't really tell you, you know, not straight out, face-to-face, like I should. We'll fight again, and then the darkness will set in on both of us. Me, I never want to live in that place again. Instead , I'll write it to you here, for both of us. Because part of me will never truly be happy until you are again. So please listen...

I left because when the wind blew in the trees, it blew cold and rattled in my bones, and when I turned to you for warmth, I found too little. Perhaps I didn't turn the right way; maybe I should have done that differently too. But in the end, some crucial part of me went off on its own, searching, searching.......

I left beacuse when we went shopping, you never understood my style. You always had something to say. I felt like everything u wanted me to do was censored to your liking, and that is no way to live....I need to live freely.

I left because if we talked about it, you'd maintain your position stauchly and finally convince me that I was being ridiculous, vain, or selfish, or foolish, or mean, or whatever u needed to say to win the fight.

I left because there developed, without me really knowing it was happening, a kernel of resentment, alienation, and loneliness that sat inside me always as I moved through my daily life, working, talking, with people. working, and always searching, searching, in secret, for something else, some other life, some other road to a kind of happiness that I thought, perhaps, might exist for some others, wondering why that could not be me, or if--- even more terrifying---it could.

I left because when I saw two people kissing on a city street, it hurt me. Assholes, I thought. Kissing out in public like that. Why dont they get a room?

I left because I could not stay and live.

I left because I was dying. Not metaphorically. I saw myself on a train platform, one hand clutching my left arm. Or was it my right? It doesn't matter. The image haunted me persistently. Now it's gone. Today when I think about the end of my days, I see myself at the age of 90, a shriveled bean, walking on a beach somewhere. The sun is setting. I am happy and looking forward to dinner.

I left beacuse there is no other life than this one that we are given, and to live it as if it belonged to someone else, no matter how beloved, is wrong.

I left beacuse you would not change that deep part of you that none of us can change, the who of who we are, the part that dreams at night, that needs to order the world in a certain way.

I dont blame you for that. It's very hard, and part of you has to die in order for it to happen. I know you will say I never reallly gave you the chance. That may be true. It feels to me like a gave you the chance every day for a long, long time.

I left because that part of me that was unmoored was an unmanageble beast, roving like a predator through the world, hunting for something to feed itself. I could never understand it.

Now I know what it was. It was my heart.

I left beacuse I was faithful to you and it did not feed that thing that was inside me until it would not be satisfied with anything but true love.

and yes, I left you beacuse my whole, hungry heart was unavailable when the right person came along, and I found that person who saw me not as a girlfriend to be managed but as a woman, not even as a woman,no, but as a wondrous being of infinite interest and worth, who liked the way my skin felt when he touched it. He touched it absently, without knowing he was doing so, with the tip of his finger on the back of my arm, not for any purpose except that something inside of him felt good when he did so, and something about that moved me so much that I literally felt the disconected, roving, ravening thing inside me turn over on its back and, for the first time, meld into the rest of me.

I left because you didnt really love me. No, no. Not really. I know that now. And thats all right.

But not really.

I didn't do it well, I know. I didn't leave the way one is supposed to to, by talking things out and fighting fights that should perhaps been fought long ago, or rekindling that which should have beenunkindled, or fessing up, or leaving everybody their dignity. I lied. I went behind ur back. I held myself apart and pursued my own destiny, as I had been doing for a long time. Couldn't u see that?

And so now I will say what I have to say once more, not for the last time: I'm sorry. I wish a lot of things. But I dont and I can't unwish my happiness-no, maybe not that; I can't unwish my chance at happiness, at life, at a true life where no part of me is left to wander and wonder and crave some mysterious thing it does not have.

I left beacuse I had to. And now? Now you must leave me. Not in hate, not in anger, not even in regret. Leave me for the life you should be living, with somebody whose heart u wholly own and who owns yours. Maybe then you and I can reclaim our memories. We have, after all, so many. And in spite of why i left, and all I left, they remain sweet to me.

Those I will never leave behind.

Its Soooo Worth It !

here i was sick in bed, feeling awful, and had literally slept my life away today when i log on to Blogger to catch up on my reading and see the beautiful, talented, and very entertaining Robyn Latice has once again rewarded me not once but TWICE with blog awards !

*smiles really wide and waves wildly "Heyyy Girrrrl !"

the last time i received a award i wasn't aware of the fact there were "rules" when you get one lol so this time I'm going to do this right... or try.

Stuff That Makes Me Happy...

  • Shopping ... [when you look good you feel good so you'll do good]

  • Family... [we seem to have the best inside jokes]

  • Exercise... [you just gotta do it]

  • Movies... [Pretty Woman, Whip It, The Green Mile, Forrest Gump, etc]

  • Blogging... [i wish i lived near all of you. i have a feeling we would be the best of friends !]

  • Culture... [there are people in the world that still have class, morals, standards, and exercise respect]

  • Music... [stories to a beat]

  • Food... [the reason why i work out six days a week lol]

  • Flowers... [sucker for tulips ]

  • Love... [i haven't gave up on it. i just gave up on looking. thanks Jaizeah for wording my feelings so well ;) ]

  • Knowledge... [nothing like expanding your mind]

  • "My Shows"... [sex & the city, as told by Liz, teen mom, Roseanne, iron chef america, etc]

  • Blackberry... [Aim, texting, Google, Facebook, BB messaging, etc]

  • People... [i love meeting new people. everybody has a story]

  • Starbucks... [read my post Once Upon A Addict]

  • Piercings... [my mom said shes going to use me as a strainer if i get one more lol]

umm i cant think of anything else right now. NyQuil is pretty much taking me down . i was pushing for twenty things that make me happy because i received two awards but just cant do it.

10 Bloggers Worthwhile Reading:

i only gave the award to seven people. i intended to give it to ten but i don't follow many blogs because its always the same thing: music videos, fashion, celebrity updates, etc. i actually like to read well thought out posts. so I'm with Robyn when i say there are some people that i will NOT be following after i post this. sorry guys, nothing personal.

well that's all folks. to Robyn, thanks again for the awards love. definitely brightened my day and makes blogging worthwhile. to the six special people that received the award from me, you guys are great writers ! your personal experiences, words of wisdom, and random tidbits are truly entertaining and i love every post. keep them coming !


Hello new followers ! Welcome to my world of words. Thanks for joining my team.


Saturday, January 23

Out Of My Mind . Back In A Hour .

It took me exactly seventeen minutes from the time I woke up to now, for me to be sprawled out on my bed in petulance !

*rolls over and furiously types* that was a good opening line.

Why must she get under my skin like this?! In the most woah!-where-did-that-come-from! way . On what was starting off as a very good day...

*plays with her belly ring, closes eyes and let's the mental recap take over*

"What are you doing?"

*profusely enthralled with something on her Blackberry*

One word, "Facebook."

"Why aren't you dressed?"

*pauses from writing on Anthony's wall and thinks 'look lady, I let the first dumb question you asked go. Must you keep testing my patience.'

More subtle tone, "I've decided not to wash. I need to shower and do some personal things, but no worries me and Karen made a arrangement."

*LaDaDa back to FB*

Then it happens. Black Girl Syndrome kicks in. She shifts her weight to one leg, which causes her arms to cross, a penetrating stare of the eyes, and a finale of pursed lips.

*looks over Blackberry.*

"How are you going to expect someone else to wash your dirty clothes. That I'm not dirty, my clothes aren't this dirty you speak of. Dirty... That's such a dirty sounding word is just unacceptable Sparkle my nickname you should have been up so you could go wash them. maybe I would have if someone hadn't just woke me up to get them ready ohhh FOUR MINUTES AGO ! WHILE YOU BOTH ARE FRESH, DRESSED, AND READY TO GO ALREADY ! *chest heaves up and down* your an adult." swell, today I'm a adult! -_- can we keep the memos coming daily so I'll know everyday what you'll be treating me as.

a three minutes tussle and here I am. on a bed with no sheets or comforter, after a door slammed, and six very fast paces back and forth.

*opens eyes and hears the voices outside of her door. sigh. Gets up and reaches for the door knob . Stops short. Turns around and starts to pace.*

- inner back and forth -

If she just wouldn't nag so damn much !... Or maybe if you didn't procrastinate so much... No! If she wouldn't be so anal about things... Or if you were more serious about things... She needs to back off and quit attacking !... You're just defensive... She always has to tell me what to do!... You never want to be told what to do...

*stops and sits on the floor. rubs temples. deep breath, slow release*

Let's be adults about this. Is this anything out of the normal for us? no. Will it blow over? As soon as she says 'Sparkle could've came. we was at the house long enough for her to take a shower' which she will say sometime between the car ride and when she's getting tired of washing. then my sister will ride in *galloping hooves* like the fair maiden she is. long brown hair flowing and shield held high on a white stallion and save the day !

A exaggerated daydream and thirty minutes of cardio later ...

*reclines in La-Z-Boy with arms behind her head.* I've decided to forgive her. People make mistakes. We're human. I'll just clean my room. procrastinated for one OR two weeks about that and be dressed to get my nails, brows, and feet done when she returns...

Okay who am I kidding ! I'll apologize. Along with all the above. After all I love my mommy even though she nags, doesn't always understand, and has O.C.D. *laughs to herself* I mean procrastination is probably going to be enough reason for me to want to kill my kid oneday too ! : )


Thursday, January 21

Live And Learn .

I don't consider myself a ride or die chick because like my girl Tashay Royal said i dont posess that "he can fuck around on me , but I'm going to always be right here." kind of attitude. that "I'm a ride whether he robbing a bank , selling drugs , and sitting behind bars for life." kind of attitude BUT I am a good woman. I'll stand by you, support you, help you out, and love you but I'm NOT going to break my pockets taking care of you or stand for any of the above.

*Gwen stretches out on the couch and crosses her legs*

I used to date this douche lord named ... Hmm let's call him Joe. In the beginning Joe seemed real legit. Good job, car, own crib. etc. Basically put on a good front. After our first date we spent a lot of time together. Started dating and everything was bueno. It always is in the beginning.

*rolls eyes and holds head with her hand*

About a month and a half into the relationship the excuses start. For instance Joe lost his job. Wait. That's not accurate. "My job is moving." So you don't have a job. "I'm just not working till they get moved in a month or two." So you don't have a job. "I have a job, I'm just not working it right now." You're getting no hours. You're getting no money. You don't have a job.

Joe decides he wants me to meet his family. We go and see his mom first. Moms and I are talking and enjoying Maury. "Want to see my room?" Your room? "Here it is" Your mom kept all your stuff in your room? "Well I do live here."

*tires screetch*

You told me you had your own spot... ? "Mm Ready to go see my aunt?" No ! I want you to introduce me to the well put together person I met at in and out burger.

*sits pretzel style and prepares to get down to It*

As times goes on I'm noticing all the confident answers are meaningless empty words and I suddenly don't need him for a damn thing. I don't sleep around. In fact I can count all my sexual partners on one hand with two fingers but it didn't take experience for me to know the dick was TRASH ! I'm talking not one orgasm licky licky or sticky sticky.

*sprawls out on the couch*

When your not being satisfied and coming out of pocket for EVERYTHING your patience is *snaps fingers* that short. I had no problem helping him out when he fell a little short but when you cant afford to keep gas in your own car, pay your cellphone bill, and trying to live like you can afford caviar on a cheeseburger budget you need to STOP ! and get your priorities in check. WITHOUT ME .


I get burnt out just talking about this waste of life form.

The icing on the cake was when we were driving from Joe's house in Sacramento to my house in Vacaville and we had to go to the gas station. Its five in the morning, I've had two hours of sleep, and I'm riding with somebody I can barely stand to be around let alone talk to. so when he knowingly put his debit card into the gas ATM, received NO money and got back in the car with NO gas I knew he was with the shenanigans. Joe has less than a fourth of a tank but decides to drive all the way to Davis when "Babe, you think I can borrow ten dollars to get some gas."

*blank stare*

Hell no you broke ass, erectile disfunctioning, loser ! And if I say no?

*immediately purses her lips, crosses her arms, and a big ass PSH !*

he exits the freeway and turns into the gas station. That's right! or I'll be walking to my damn house from Davis! I give him the ten dollars knowing he has no intention of paying me back because he hasn't even paid my MOM back the ten dollars he borrowed from her, or the sixty dollars he borrowed from my SISTER to send me flowers! None of which I knew about till after I kicked him to the curb. i mean this punk idiot knew he didnt have any money when we left Sacramento! dont act like the shit just hit you when we are potentially about to be stuck on the side of the road.

*sits up and leans forward shaking head. contemplates smoking a cigarette* not even a smoker.

Along with that ten dollars, I gave him the cold shoulder and swore to never give him the chance to be in my presence again. You Are The Weakest Link, Goodbye !

My thing is this: Don't start something your not going to continue throughout the relationship. Fuck impressing me the first date by opening my door, talking yourself up big to not have any of what you spoke of, and paying for the date or plural if your not going to continue with this type of treatment. And make sure you know that you know that you know what to do in the bedroom before you start kissing, touching, and getting a girl all worked up.

*rolls eyes, crosses legs, and folds arms*

It crossed my mind that maybe he was playing me but I am the spawn of a true life playa. Game recognize game and you looking kinda unfamiliar - Riley from The Boondocks


Wednesday, January 20

Raise Your Hand .

if you know you had a pair of Classic Whites !
*raises hand*

and you needed two scoops or more !

*raises hand*

lol the good ole days .


iCrush .

on this man right here . yep . its been going on for quite some time and has yet to waver . while all the Bow Wow and Trey Songz fever is still going strong so is mine for F A B . weather its the fact he has yet to fix his chipped tooth or his laid back, type chill demeanor in addition to his undeniable flow hes made a fan out of me and been my choice for "Who Id Date If I Was In The Industry." hey a girl can dream .


No Point At All .

its three in the morning . I'm awake . why ? i have no idea . i haven't had a normal sleeping pattern since freshmen year in high school . i cant pin point weather it was the subconscious stress of being a 'teenager' or the countless nights of late night phone conversations with the steady boyfriend i kept for two years . way to catch a girl in her coming out . asshole .

I'm watching Serendipity . love the title . hate the movie . I'm not a fan of the up and down back and forth chase me thing . it gets boring, predictable, and only makes me scream at the TV "Hurry up your about to miss her!!!" "Nooo ! He's coming ! Just wait a minute girl !!" . does he ever get there in time? does she ever wait? sure . a hour and some odd minutes later . -_-

we don't have any toothpicks in this house . me and my nephew have openly voiced this fact countless times and yet, we still don't have any . this normally wouldn't bother me . the toothpick thing but do you know what kinds of foods get stuck in your teeth ? .... ALL KINDS OF FOODS ! my next reminder will be via text message since that's the only thing they can seem to remember . their cellphones .

i hate being awake . maybe i should rephrase . thank you lord for allowing me to be awake BUT i hate being awake when i should be asleep . resting . why ? because i want to eat . not eat a meal and call it a night . i want to snack . the tasty Doritos . followed by a spoon and a pint of B&J Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough . and a handful of white cheddar Cheez-Its to get rid of the sweet taste in my mouth ...

*gets out of her bed and heads to the kitchen . stops mid hallway, turns around, and walks back in room . paces back and forth a few times touching her stomach . flops back on bed and grabs laptop . shakes head .*

i need to go to sleep .


Monday, January 18

We The Best . ?

Am I the only one that can see pass his 'let's bring everybody together' act and see what Dj Khaled is really doing?

My point of view:

Dj Khaled got cool with all the black people in the industry and put them on one track. Extorting their talents while our black people are okay with the arrangement because its paying and what's going to sell records.

He says the same things every song yet the less, and gets the same amount of recognition, sometimes more. Some would argue and say well he's a dj. That's what he's suppose to do. And hey, point made but how much significance should a person hold for knowing who's hot in the industry and putting them on a track? Anybody that knows music can slap DJ in front of their name and do the same thing.

But now that i think about it, can i really be mad at him or should i be mad at my own people for not being able to come together on their own.


Sunday, January 17

I Did It !

i went ahead and made a facebook. *applause rings out among the crowd and gwen takes a bow* i dont feel like i was missing anything and its only been one day. *chin in hands while she taps fingers on the sides of her face* i made it last night while watching king of the hill. *perks up quickly* but the little widget you can put on your blogger ---->
is cute and makes me feel cool ! *puts on her shades and pops her polo collar up*

i guess itll be cool to have ALL my family on my page and talk to my fellow blogging pals. i always wondered how i could get in contact with you sensational people, well now i have made a way. so reach out and touch a sista sometime ! i swear all of you seem so interesting !
and im not half bad myself . lol


was this not one of the BEST choreographed videos ever ! i love it, learned it, and whenever it comes on cant help but do the dance to it.
nothing like good music to get you grooving !


Saturday, January 16

Im Contemplating ...

making a facebook .
yes ? no ?

yea, i know im hella late but i usually dont go along with crowds on crap like this. i mean really. social networking sites are only popular for so long before something new comes out and bam! there you are. eagarly giving all your information up to get your brand spanking new account and meet the world AGAIN ! ... damn. maybe i just answered my own question "no gwen. you should not make a facebook."

*whines* "but MySpace is boring now!"

2009 farewell MySpace . 2010 ello' facebook ?


Friday, January 15

Bags ...

under my eyes. *sigh*
Ive never had these but i guess between all the crying yesterday and tossing and turning last night i shouldn't be surprised to see them on my face. i feel horrible today. hungover like. minus the alcohol consumption.

i have strayed away from my usual hour and a half workout regime and eating right and have been depression binging.

at least i did attempt to get dressed and do my hair today. *half smile* only to shortly trade my fitted black leather bomber, off shoulder Run DMC shirt, leather leggings, and matching supras for a shirt and sweats. *slumps shoulders*

I'm glad i didn't make it to makeup before realizing i really wasn't feeling it and washing it right off.

i wonder how long I'm going to be like this... because right now feels like forever...

great. my mom just made cake. -_-


Thursday, January 14

It'll Get Better ...

I'm losing in this game called life right now . I'm coming up short more than on top and instead of a royal flush my cards all bust . My patience is wearing thin and my motivation and faith is dissolving faster than sugar in water . I'm trying to keep my chin up but in a constant shift how do you maintain still ? Maybe I'm giving these thoughts too much power over me and my life . Maybe I'm making it too easy on this feeling to completely capture my spirit and mentality . I haven't yet uttered the words of blame on 2010 . I mean can I really when its only been one day....


How Convenient .

I don't know if its this new health kick - take care of my body - regularly working out - eating right - yada yada yada hype that I'm on but when I saw the commercial for the New McDonalds Mac Snack Wrap .... *blank stare, shakes head*

To me that completely defeats the purpose of a snack wrap. If your going to eat the beef from a big mac in a tortilla with lettuce and cheese why not just go to Taco Bell AND pop open a bottle of thousands island dressing and add a squirt if you just need that 'secret sauce'.

Sorry Mickey D's. I'm just not sold.


Tuesday, January 12

I Only Use Pink Lotion .

as i stood there holding a conversation with my older sister about the difference between Yaki and Remy hair two females walked in seemingly at home in the beauty supply store with heads adorned with highlighter colored head scarves and pajamas on. they walked down a separate aisle and made their way back up the aisle we were on and began talking loudly about hair: texture, length, and color. as i looked at my sister and gave her the look to make our escape route one girl asked me "excuse me? what kind of hair do you use? your weave is nice with the curls and bangs." excuse me? weave? "i don't know why you asking her. she probably stuck up." girl number two said under her breath while rolling her eyes. its 2010, God please give me the strength to not slap this chick. I'm pissed off by this time. "its called genetics." POW ! Gwen - 1 , Girls -0

"OoOh really?! is that a new line or something?"

-_- really ?

as if that wasn't enough !

as we are in line the same two girls are in front of us. steady talking loud to be noticed, rolling their necks, and hi fiving in agreement about complete ignorant subjects. i don't think of myself as being better than anyone but damn. its bad enough your African American must you really act so ignorant and in public. but what took the cake was as girl number two talked about her babys father "bitching and moaning" about paying child support "because of his new bitch" rolls eyes. she goes on about how she is a "bad bitch" and shouldn't be seen at the social services office trying to get on welfare when she deserves the best. not her child deserves the best but she does. girl number one gives the regular ole "hm mm girl i feel you" and adds "all i know is that i miss getting paper food stamps so i could get the change back." and guess what happens next?

the infamous hi-five.



Sunday, January 10

MTV Jams 3 Most Ridiculous Commercials .

Why Would Anyone Have To pay To Get That Kind Of Workout ? Lol.

You Lazy Brawds. Squats, Kick Backs, and Jogging. Guys Get A Touch Or Two In On The Dance Floor Before You Decide To Take Shawty Home. She Might Be A FRAUD !!!

You're Going To Love My Nuts ?! Lol.


Thursday, January 7

Someone Had To Say It .

I love the black men of the world.

The different shades of you. The different stances that you hold yet still so strong. You are a Picasso of a being. Misinterpreted, misunderstood, yet still so important and beautiful. You create smiles and frowns. Bring joy and pain. Wipe away tears and can cause them to rain. You take on the world and still get up the next day. A doctor, a lawyer, a surgeon, a president. Not just a athlete or statistic imprisoned. You stand for more than just a being you are a survivor, striver, a way maker. You perfectly compliment the beautiful black women that make brown love a story, a song, a movie. Step up and be who you are. Live up to your personal potential. Reach for the stars high in your sky's and expectations, disregard. We'll love you. Stand by you. Accept you. Understand that its hard for you not just because of who you are but all you represent.

one might, hundreds might, thousands might not but,

I love you black man.


Wednesday, January 6

The Love You Deserve .

I love when people doubt me, misread me, and disregard me as nothing more than some conceited, superficial, high maintenance chick. Why? Because the shocked looks on their faces and the loss of words is the silent victory when I lose the slang and drop the Ebonics and speak with my ever expanding vocabulary and thorough understanding of each and every sentence I form.

What people fail to realize, although I'm randomly always ranting about whatever comes to mind and known to do my share of not so smart things, I am a very intelligent, well informed, type chill person. We can shoot the breeze about anything under the sun from real world issues to caramel vs. carmel. Which is why I love Blogger !

I know a lot of you are into Facebook, Twitter, and like me MySpace but I actually prefer Blogger over any social Network. Why? Because its based on opinions, thoughts, and feelings which are more important than the same ole half naked defaults and "so cool" rhyming updates and random tweets. Its getting to know a real person through their personal expression of words and I digg that.


new and old. you guys are amazing! if any of you have been to my MySpace page you will see under who id like to meet it says all my followers on Blogger. i respect and have so much love for all of you. every last one of your creative, unique writing styles and your different and artistic opinions and outlooks. it humbles me greatly to know so many people i have never met think my writing is interesting enough to keep updated on. thank you, thank you, thank you ! i don't say it enough but I'm definitely going to start. you guys are never overlooked or disregarded around these parts. ( :


Tuesday, January 5

Online Applications .

You apply online and NEVER get a call back.
Bring Back Paper Applications !
At least then they have to look at you and fake interest.


Monday, January 4

Laugh Of The Day .

All involved : Myself, my niece Simone, my buddies Josh and Chris

Simone : Somebody commented my pic and said my titties look like crabby patties !

*Josh and I look at each other and start laughing .

Chris : I don't see what's so bad about that? *he laughs a little*

*Josh and I are still laughing .

Simone : Man shut up this shit aint funny. *she cant help but laugh*

*Josh and I are STILL laughing .

Chris : I'm just trying to build you up while they laughing at you. I mean *Spongebob voice* Who doesn't love Krabby Patties ?!

*Josh and I end up up on the floor. DYING !

ahhh goodtimes.


Sunday, January 3

We Are Young Money .

Not a bad album compared to some i have heard. I didn't buy it but i took the time to listen to it thoroughly and download certain songs. Loving the beats ! My only qualm is, unless your specifically looking to hear your new favorite Young Money artist, disappointment will set in. From the cover to the album its Wayne all over the place. Sure there is like a BILLION ! people on his label but IF he would have given up one.. or FIVE ! of his verses then maybe i wouldnt have felt like i was listening to a Wayne cd with countless featured artists.

Consistent Plays :

#5 - New Shit
#8 - Fuck Da Bullshit
*Nicki went hard, Drake wasnt bad
#12 - Roger That
*Nicki again and Tyga
#13 - She Is Gone
*Gudda Gudda
#14 - Streets Watchin'
*David Banner did his thang on the beat !
and once again Nicki.

I admit everybody pretty much held their own and did their thang lyrically wise. some better than others mack maine, but that's usually what happens on a group thang, right. Nobody really made me want to run out and say "man did you here *insert name here* on the Young Money album ! no? well you need to !" I was feeling Nicki on every song she was on and Tyga, Jae Millz, Gudda Gudda, And Drake weren't disappointing either. As for the Young Money songstress Shanell, she was only on one song. You better learn to rap girl!


Moment Of Weakness .

It never really bothered me. Being alone. This single thing. Take your pick. But on this particular night while all my friends are cuddled up, out on dates, or simply getting their fuck on here I am. Alone in bed watching countless episodes of Sex and The City and eating cupcakes. Sounds more like figure suicide. Yea, just prepare the unfashionable white straight jacket and matching padded room. "she's a live one!"

There they are on my flat screen. Living these amazing lives in the fast paced city of tall buildings and endless possibilities. Wearing great fashions and dating the kind of men I have yet to find ! Aidan


Okay Gwen get it the hell together! Snap the flip out of it! Your coming unhinged! Its not a curse to be alone... More of a relationship vacation ! *straightens posture and smiles

Who am i kidding?! *slumps It's been a year and 4 months. *grabs a cupcake and takes a bite

One IS the loneliest number.


Saturday, January 2

Looks Good .

Keep your Jayonce's and Amber Rose-Kanye West's...


Hank Baskett and Kendra Wilkinson .
*NFL Indianapolis Colts, Girls Next Door

" I'll take one please, thanks ! "